Note: The following post was submitted by a close friend of eloise.
Sure I think about what it would be like to be single again. I’d be crazy not to. Would I go back if I could? Never. Although lately I’m thinking yes. My single girlfriends sometimes moan about not having a boyfriend, fiancé, husband... but what they don’t know is that us “involved” ladies sometimes whine about having one. So next time you are out, please have a guy buy you a drink. Make out with random 20-somethings in the men’s bathroom. Have fun. As for me, I will be blissfully standing in the corner, fiancé in hand, all the while living a single life vicariously through you...
In a world where staying true to one person for as long you both shall live is quickly going out of fashion, I am taking the plunge. My fiancé and I have not always been the loving couple we were in the first few days of being betrothed. In fact, most of our relationship is very reminiscent of the fights we have now, 3 months into wedding planning. I thought this was supposed to be a time where we learn what living happily ever after is like? Wrong. Or... worse yet... is this the true happily ever after?
Let’s rewind back a bit. I am sixteen, Justin is seventeen. I am sitting listening to what my new job as a lifeguard will entail when he walks in. Sure I had seen him before in high school, but wow. About a week later we had our first conversation. I was in a fight with my father over staying too late at my current boyfriend’s house - who also worked with us - and went on and on how ridiculous parents are. Justin sat there listening, sharing stories of his girlfriend. Damn, he had a girlfriend. I had forgotten that I was also attached.
We continued through the summer, always flirting but always trying not to get caught. Summer ended, school began, and we both separately broke up with our significant others. Finally.
As any high school crush progresses, we talked on AIM throughout the school year. Another summer came and I decided he would be my “goal” of the summer, while he was told by my ex to stay away. I had broken my ex’s heart and he wasn’t going to let me be happy. So as any other high school girl would do, I set my ex up with a friend. Within two weeks my goal had been reached and Justin and I were “together”. By the end of the summer, just as he was about to leave for college, we decided to be exclusive. I knew the first time we kissed that I was going to marry him one day. Cheesy? Yes. But true nonetheless - just read my diary from that day.
Our relationship has had its fair share of arguments. I think any of my girlfriends can tell you that. But for two years now the arguments have subsided and we have been blissfully gliding along. Until now that is. Our fights seem to be at an all time high. But why? Why should we be in the middle of a screaming match over what hotel to host our wedding guests at? Or about who his best man is, or in his case best MEN? Does the guest list actually deserve an all out brawl? Nope, yet I couldn’t have dreamt that these arguments would happen. These stupid, stupid arguments. But here we are. In engagement hell as I have conveniently coined it.
However, I still stand strong that yes, you can live happily ever after. Just like in those famous Disney fairytales we all love. It just takes time. I realize I am the exception, not the rule - but doesn’t dreaming to be the exception keep us believing that true love is possible? And I do believe that all of our ups and downs have made us stronger. I know that we may revert back to our teenage fights, but through it all we are best friends. And I didn’t need “The Game” to get him. ...Or did I? Perhaps I used techniques in that book and didn’t even know it! Maybe I should take Eloise’s advice and read it. Hey, maybe it could spice up our love life and avert some of these petty engagement fights? Either way, I will forever be love’s cheerleader. Because even in our biggest fights I can still look him in the eyes and know that no matter what I love that man and that he will be there for me for as long as we both shall live.
Happy Valentine’s Day to all
the love believers out there, including you Eloise.
love, a