He asked for my number and then called my phone to make sure that I had his as well. Then he told me his last name, “In case you want to Google me," he said.
Now that you mention it, I probably will, I thought.
It’s no secret that the Internet has been a disruptive technology for the rules and regulations of the dating game but the act of Googling someone is a new one for me. I’ll Google to find almost anything, but will I Google to get a background check on the latest prospect? It never really comes to mind.
Until recently.
While skimming through websites, I recently came across a Q&A with etiquette experts. Someone wrote in asking if it was okay to admit to Googling someone on the first date. Before even reading the answer I immediately thought, “Is she crazy? I would never admit to that.”
But I was wrong. This etiquette expert wrote that everyone should expect that they’ve been Googled prior to going out and that it’s not tacky at all to bring up some of the information you find, if it’s positive. The suggestion was to say something along the lines of “I saw that you ran in a 5k recently. Are you a runner?”
After reading this, I Googled myself, or went narcissurfing as I’ve been informed is the correct term for when you Google yourself. Nothing conclusive showed up. A few random activities popped up, but nothing that would allow you to decipher anything meaningful.
I then Googled the guy who gave me his number. I actually found out a lot. I found a few pages with all of his college activities from a few years ago, old newspaper articles about his days as an athlete in high school, his LinkedIn page, some photos from some volunteering projects he did, and his public Facebook listing. It was a jackpot of information. I spent a solid 20 minutes sifting through everything.
Then I regretted it. Not because it was creepy (it was), but because it kind of took the fun out of getting to know this kid. What was I going to talk to him about when he called again and when we went out? I’m the type of person that only asks questions when I’m curious. What would I be curious about since his whole life was listed on a Google search? The usual getting-to-know-you questions were now off the table. Google had now brought new complications on board. Searching for trivial information was easy, but it made the relationship search more involved.
What would I do with this newfound info? Would I take the advice of the etiquette experts and admit to Googling him and use the info I found as a conversation starter? Would I pretend I was clueless and forge ahead with the usual questions? Would I just abandon anything related to his searchable information and keep topics to those that were completely unrelated?
I would have much rather heard stories of his high school lacrosse days instead of seeing scores and game synopses from the local paper. Don’t Google people. It’s creepy no matter what you say. Okay, maybe just do a quick search to make sure that he’s not on America’s Most Wanted list, but beyond that, save the Q&A for the real date.
love eloise
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